Fuwa tries to get Nagisa LAID LAID not laid
by THE BLIND KING
Summary: Fuwa takes Nagisa across several anime shows to get him LAID LAID
1. Chapter 1

AN: I don't own anything

"What you've never been on a date before?" I had been completely surrounded by all of my classmates. "Uhh no." Maehara then walked up to him. "Dude you have got to get laid." "What the hell Maehara?" "What I'm just saying?" "Don't you think it's too much?" "Meh." Fuwa then got a hold of me. "Wait Fuwa what are you..." "Don't worry about it I foresaw this event and made this." Fuwa then showed Nagisa a remote control. "Uhh what's that?" "A TV remote." "Okay why do you have a TV remote?" "Duh how else do you think I know so much about anime or manga?"

Well Fuwa made a good point she did know a lot about anime and manga. "So what are we gonna watch porn or what?" "No of course not we are going to visit every single anime possible and try to get you a date or laid whichever comes first." "Wait but aren't we already in a..." Fuwa then pressed the button and were teleported to a different dimension. "What the where are we?" "The TV guide channel next up we have to visit him." "Him?" "Him." They then saw a man with a crown blocking his eyes. "Sup." "Sup." So I guess they know each other. "Is this the guy?" "Yep can you help him?" "Nah shouldn't be too difficult character model's pretty good you rarely ever get one like this so you have any preferences Nagisa?" "How do you know my name?"

He pointed over to the guide and there was my answer. "Okay dumb question... Uhh I guess I don't really know." "Well there are a lot of crazy ones out there." "Uhh none of those please." "May not have a choice if you are too picky." "Okay do you have any recommendations?" "A few but depends how would you feel about women who are older?" "How much older?" "Hundreds if not thousands of years old." "Are they ugly?" He then pulled out a picture of a green haired girl with a weird symbol on her forehead. "Who is that?" "Her name is CC she is from Code Geass she is several centuries old." "Uhh then I guess not." "Okay then Fuwa here take this."

He then handed her extra batteries. "Just in case. Also the remote will pull you out of anywhere and back here. You know what here is an extra remote just in case because some of the girls you will meet are going to be kind of crazy." "How crazy?" "It's anime dude what do you think?" "Okay good point." "Thank you mister Blind King sir." "Fuwa be careful when you guys are lodged in to a harem show you know how the girls there can get." "Yeah yeah don't worry about it." "Okay I do have a place you guys can go as a good start." "Really where?"

Then we were teleported again. "Ugh where are we?" "Wow to think he would teleport us here first." "Here where is..." I looked around me the entire place seemed lifeless and barren. The floor was completely checkered and chains protruded from the ground to the sky. Then we walked for a while to see destroyed columns and a woman resting above a throne. "Wow to think he would set you up with her." "Her? Where are we?" "Black Rock Shooter." "WHAT?" "So that woman there is..." "Black Gold Saw." "Fuwa I can't do this let's get out of here she will kill us." "Relax Nagisa she is actually really nice when you get to meet her." "You know her?" "Of course we've hung out before."

Then a giant sword was launched at their feet. "Then again I did take her watering can without asking so she might be pissed." "Oh great." She walked over to them and stood in front of Fuwa and extended her hand. "Listen I'm here to get my friend over here laid or a date so can you help?" She looked at me then she lunged at me. "Fuwa why is she trying to hit me?" "Oh that's right you look just like her nemesis." Then she backed me into a corner. That's it I'm going to die here. "Wait I have it here." She turned back to see Fuwa with the watering can. Saw was ready to claim it until Fuwa hid it behind her. "Only if you have sex with my friend." "FUWA!" "What that's what we are here for isn't it?" Saw then turned around and walked back to me. "Uhh hey listen you don't have to if you don't want to." She offered her hand to me, and I took it.

I was and idiot she held on tight and wouldn't let go. Then she took me behind the throne, and did things that I thought were anatomically impossible. I walked back out with my body being defiled? I mean I enjoyed and she was actually really beautiful, but I mean she obviously only did it to get her watering can back. "So how was it?" "Uhh it was good." "Really only good not perfect, amazing, mind blowing?" "Well I mean yeah that too but I uhh..." I turned over to Saw and saw that she was blushing? No way. "So Saw I see that my friend here performed admirably?" She then smiled at Fuwa then to me. "Well that's good well Nagisa let's go."

Saw then placed her hand on Fuwa's shoulder. "Weren't gonna let me leave with it were you?" Fuwa then handed the watering can back to her. "Well Nagisa let's go." Saw placed her hand on her shoulder again. "Fine here is your sword take it I hope you are happy I know I won't be." Fuwa then pressed the button and teleported is back to him. The Blind King then spoke to me. "Wow Nagisa can't believe you got her pregnant." "What are you... No." "Yep you my man are gonna go far in life." "I mean I have to go back to her what if..." "Yeah probably I mean she really loves you you know, but for right now we have to keep looking." "What I thought it was over and done." "Not even close my man we have to get you LAID LAID not laid." "Is there a difference?" "I dunno." "So Blind King sir where to next?" "Hmm I dunno how about I let you call the shots from here on out Fuwa." "Hmm ooh I know just where to go next." Then we teleported to another dimension.

Black Gold Saw POV

I looked everywhere for it I was sure it was in the same spot. She must have taken it. She took Black Rock Shooter's katana. I guess I should have seen it coming she is a sneaky one. I placed a hand over my belly. He was cute, and affectionate. Maybe our child will be like that too.

AN: So if you have any requests go ahead. I need Character Name/ Name of Anime/ Situation/ and object that Fuwa has for black mail. No lemons or yaoi. I'am willing to go as far as it takes to pair Nagisa with someone hell I made him have a kid with Cinder in another fic of mine so yeah.


	2. Chapter 2 Lulu Bell D Gray Man

AN: I don't own anything

"Well here we are." "Where is here exactly?" "D. Gray-Man." "The gray man?" "No D. Gray-Man." "Oh... OH." "So yeah I have a friend here she's been going through a bit of a rough patch and I think she might need someone to hang on to." "What kind of a rough patch?" "Just a break up I guess you could say." "Right so how are you gonna bribe her?" "With this." Fuwa pulled out some bells. "Bells... You stole them didn't you?" "No... Yeah." "So what's her name?" "Lulu Bell or Lulubell or Lustol take your pick." "I assume she is into bells as a result?" "Meh maybe, but these particular bells are important to her." "Man anime creators are getting lazy with names what don't tell me she has a cat fetish?" Fuwa stopped in her tracks. "Not exactly a cat fetish." "Fuwa..." "She can turn into a cat, and shape shift so you know it doesn't get any better oh and she represents lust, but not like Lust from Fullmetal Alchemist, but then again she wasn't really lustful I mean she was attractive, but that's it. I mean in the original she played a more..."

"Fuwa let's just go." "Okay." We walked for a while until we found the woman Fuwa was referring to. "Hey there Lulu." The woman seemed troubled in a way, but that was probably because Fuwa was well Fuwa. "Hey Fuwa who's your friend?" "His name is Nagisa and he is here to rock your world." The woman raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?" "He is here to sleep with you well more like the other way around." "FUWA what the hell?" "C'mon Nagisa she needs this and you need this." "Fuwa I'm a father already in case you forgot." "Yeah but you heard The Blind King you need to get LAID LAID not just knocking some girl up from another dimension it just won't cut it." "Fuwa she is at least in her mid twenties."

"So what are you two doing here?" "Well as I told you Lulu you need to sleep with him." "Why?" "Because I have this." Fuwa the pulled out the bells. "Wait those are..." "Yeah they are." "But how did you..." "I... found them." "Found them?" "Yep so will you?" She looked at me then sighed. "I guess it wouldn't hurt. Let's go." "Wait, but wouldn't it be weird because..." She then looked at me. "Yeah you are right wait here." She came back with a maid outfit? "Here wear this." "Uhh why?" "Just do it." I got scared and put it on. "I suppose you will have to do." I will have to do? "My nails make them prettier." "Uhh okay... Uhh where is the..." She pointed over to the table that had everything set for me to give her a manicure. Well it's probably some kind of fetish or something.

After giving her a manicure... several times to what she considered acceptable I had to give her a foot rub. Well I guess this is the price for sex. Wait a minute where is Fuwa? I looked around me and didn't see her. She wouldn't abandon me would she? No I'm probably just... Thinking... Things... That TWO TIMING BACKSTABBING LITTLE PIECE OF... "Oh hey Nagisa have the two of you slept together?" "No Fuwa though your friend here reminds me of her." "Her?" "Oh that's right Mimi." "Yes although he is younger, male, and he isn't an Akuma he will suffice." Suffice? "Uhh Lulu we've been friends for a long time, but you can't just keep Nagisa I mean look at him he..." "Adorable, sweet, cute, and probably a lost puppy in bed." Lost puppy? "Well I thought it might come to this which is why I brought this." Fuwa then pulled out a vacuum cleaner? "Fuwa how is a vacuum cleaner going to..." She was gone and in the chair was a black cat instead hissing at Fuwa. "Lulu bad I told you to sleep with him." "Fuwa why's she a cat?" "Shape shifting remember?"

Lulu or the cat kept hissing at Fuwa then it jumped on my face. "Ow ow ow Fuwa get it off get it off." Fuwa pulled on the cat only to have it jump at her face. "Lulu what the ack..." I grabbed the cat by it's tail which automatically makes me a moron as it tried to scratch my... It just really hurt when she clung to me with her recently manicured nails. "Lulu you can't sterilize Nagisa we need him to impregnate Kayano to emphasize their relationship in our anime." She grabbed the cat and threw it near the vacuum cleaner. The vacuum cleaner sucked her tail in. "Okay Nagisa let's go." "Wait Fuwa we can't just..." We teleported back to The Blind King. "Well damn didn't see that coming." "Is she..." "She's okay, but umm it's probably for the best if the two of you don't try to kill anime characters there is a balance that must be kept." I asked him. "Really?" "Pfft no way man anime breaks it's own rules I mean look at SAO it has plot holes galore." "Uhh I..." Fuwa then spoke. "He hasn't seen it or knows what it is." "You lucky bastard. Well where are you going to take him Fuwa?" "Hmm oh I know." Then we teleported back again.

Lulu POV

She took the bells and my shades. Not to mention that they ruined my nails. If I ever find them again I swear I'll...

AN: Well this one is for Frwt not sure if you liked it, but yeah she is a tough one to write in plus I figured the whole Nagisa as Mimi thing made sense seeing as how they both have the blue hair.


	3. Chapter 3 Asuka Senran Kagura

AN: I don't own anything

We landed into another place. "Where are we?" "Senran Kagura." "Wait isn't that the..." "Well let's go see if she is here." We walked around the city for a while. "Hey Fuwa?" "Yeah?" "What did you steal from Lulu?" "Nothing." I glared back at her. No way she isn't getting anything out of this. "Okay fine I got these shades, and I kept the bells." "And?" "Okay so maybe all her shades, but c'mon who needs that many shades." I just sighed. "So who is this girl?" "Her name is Asuka she is a shinobi." "What like Naruto?" "Well sort of." "Sort of?" "Well her guardian is a toad and she was scared of frogs, and she likes large food, and her boobs defy the laws of gravity I mean even Isaac Newton would be like wow." "So what's she like?" "Like your average Shonen Jump manga or anime character, tries really hard, eats a lot, friendship, teamwork that sort of thing. Although she isn't from Shonen Jump maybe the production company is then again the creator may have taken inspiration from Naruto." "Ah I see." "Don't worry you'll really like her." It's certainly good I have her with me she really knows her stuff.

As we walked we heard an explosion. "Fuwa." "Hey that's her." I saw who she was talking about and saw the girl falling down right...on...me. I blacked out from the impact. My head was pounding when I woke up. "Ugh what happened?" "Oh hey you're awake sorry I fell on you." When I saw the girl my heart stopped she was really cute. "Uhh no it's okay I mean you couldn't have known so..." "Well I still feel bad so..." "Fuwa told you didn't she?" "Yeah." "Of course she did." "Why?" "I guess it's because I've never been with anyone so then this happens." "This?" "Oh we've been traveling in between dimensions to find the right girl for me I guess." "So where were you guy's before coming here?" "I'm not sure that I know Fuwa would be the person to ask." "Oh uhh here I made you something." She handed me sushi rolls...really...really...long sushi rolls.

I took a bite out of the first one. "Wow these are really good." "I'm glad you liked them." "So where are we anyway?" "Oh it's a special secret part of the school for shinobi to train." "How many of you are there?" "Five of us." "Are there any guys attending?" "No it's all girls although we've fought guys before,and our teacher is a guy." So it isn't a harem anime good I was afraid for a second. "So where is Fuwa?" "Uhh... Huh... That is a good question I dunno." "Asuka does this place have magical weapons, or anything like that?" "No why?" "Just a hunch." "ASUKA!" Then a blonde girl started groping Asuka. "Katsu stop it." So yuri anime then? Wow Fuwa wasn't kidding her boobs really do defy gravity. The blonde girl Katsu stopped. "So Asuka who's the cutie is she also a shinobi?" "No Katsu he's visiting?" "YOU'RE A GUY!" I banged my head against the floor. Even across dimensions they still think that I'm a girl, and if not they make me look like a girl.

"Uhh hey my name is Nagisa Shiota." "Aww I was ready to start massaging your breasts to make them bigger." I sweat dropped. Man these girls are something else. "So Asuka why'd you bring him here?" "Well I may or may not have fallen on top of him and knocked him out." "With your huge boobs?" "Katsu." "What you know they could be a dangerous weapon if used properly." The blonde girl then looked at me. "So Nagisa I can see that you've taken an interest in Asuka here." How did she... "I mean she is really cute and..." Crap. "See Asuka he thinks you are cute so why don't the two of you go out?" Asuka then started blushing. Well she is cuter that way but... It isn't right I mean... FUWA. "Hey Katsu have you seen my friend Fuwa?" "No why?" "Just wondering."

Meanwhile at Asuka's home

I finally found it Asuka's grandfather futomaki sushi rolls recipe and it's all mine. And as insurance I let Asuka know she wouldn't see her swords again. You can do it Nagisa besides you both have great character models even if she is older than you.

Back to Nagisa

"So Nagisa what's the place you're from like?" "Well it's the same minus the ninjas of course." Katsu insisted I take Asuka out so I did despite my protests. I didn't regret it or anything I mean she was cute, friendly, beautiful, and the way she looks like when she blushes... No Nagisa bad you can't do that to her. I mean I liked her, but I couldn't just sleep with her and be gone. "So Nagisa when you said you weren't with anyone before do you mean like a date?" "Yeah that too although we I did impregnate a demon girl or whatever in another dimension so I dunno." "What was she like?" "Well she was violent." "Oh?" "Yeah it was a weird experience and then a shape shifter tried to keep me as her slave and made me dress up as a maid." She giggled it was cute. "Uhh so Asuka have you ever been with anyone?" "No actually this is my first date." Date wait this is a date. "Is something the matter Nagisa?" "It's just that I've never been on a date before." "Oh I..." There was a long pause.

We simply just roamed around the city to see how much this dimension was different than mine. Then it began pouring down. "Hey let's wait here see if the rain stops." We waited under the roof of a store to see if the rain would let up. "So Asuka Fuwa told me you had a Toad or something as a guardian." "Oh yeah I used to be scared of them, but after a while I learned to like them." "Really, but it's so..." "Yeah it wasn't easy accepting that." After a moment she spoke again. "You know Nagisa I really enjoyed spending time with you even if..." "Hey look it's not that I want to sleep with you and go I... Just... I dunno." She leaned her head in my chest. "Well can we?" I blushed and my heart rate increased. "What?" "Sleep together." "Asuka hey listen I..." She placed her lips on top of mine. "Not that way silly just cuddle besides I'm really cold and my blankets aren't going to cut it." "Uhh yeah I can do that."

We headed to her school dorm through the rain. "Man I'm drenched wait here while I get us some towels." "Okay." There was a large puddle of water in the room. "Man I better clean that up or someone is going to fall." I looked around for a mop or something else to clean it up. "Ah hey Nagisa I found the..." "Asuka wait don't..." She slipped in the water and fell right on top of me. Her boobs knocked the air out of me. "Nagisa are you okay?" "Yeah I'll be fine." I think she may have broken my ribs. "Umm Nagisa..." She was blushing and still didn't move. "Yeah." "I..." There was a long pause we just remained there. "Nagisa I..." Fuwa if you can somehow communicate telepathically get me out of her I can't do this to her. Not like this she is just too sweet. "Okay fine let's go." "Huh?" Then we returned back to where The Blind King was.

"Where the hell were you Fuwa?" "Making sure you went through with it, but I guess you're right it's too much for her to handle." "You were spying on us weren't you?" "Yep." "So what'd you get out of it?" "Her sushi roll recipe I wanted to take her swords too as insurance, but I decided to leave them there." The Blind King then spoke to me. "Well I've got good news and bad news." I turned in his direction. "What's the bad news?" Then he slapped me across the face. "What the hell?" "That's for not going through with it." Why you little... "So the good news?" "Congrats her name is Broken Black Blade." "Huh?" He showed me a picture of Black Gold Saw holding our daughter. "Wow she is really cute." "Yeah she really fills the whole maternal role thing." "So where to Fuwa?" "I don't know I think it's the way his character is built you know." "Yeah I see what you mean... Well nothing you can do about it take him to the next dimension." "Yes sir." Then we were sent back into the fray.

Asuka POV

It hurt inside, but I was happy to have met someone like him. He was sweet, adorable, and cute. My chest was still pounding from that kiss. Why did I kiss him? It just felt so natural at that moment like we had always done it. Weird.


	4. Chapter 4 Winry Fullmetal Alchemist

AN: I own nothing.

"Well here we are." "And where is here exactly?" "Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood." "No Fuwa I can't be paired with Riza I mean Mustang will burn me alive." "No silly Winry." "Edward will ack..." Fuwa had knocked me out. "Ugh where am I?" I opened my eyes and saw Winry working on the automail. Crap she's gonna kill me. "Oh hey you're finally awake." "What happened?" "Well your friend dropped you off here while you were unconscious." Wait she's not friends with Fuwa then who is Fuwa friends with in this dimension?

Meanwhile with Truth

"Hey Truth." "Hey Fuwa it's been a while so who's the runt you brought with you?" "He's a friend that I'm helping get LAID LAID not just laid it's difficult." "I see has he succeeded in the other dimensions?" "Well he got a girl pregnant and he's a father, but umm no luck after that." "Well maybe it's just him." Maybe it's his character's model fitting into a set of morals... Nah that can't be it it's definitely him. I wonder if Truth has it it would be a nice addition to the collection. "So do you have it?" "Oh you mean this?" Truth then pulled out the first philosopher stone ever made.

Back to Nagisa

"So may I ask what you are doing here?" "Let's just say I'm passing by so what are you working on?" "Well my idiot friend let's call him Ed keeps getting into trouble and he keeps destroying my automail." So it would seem that I may have a shot. And in realizing what I just said makes me realize how sick and twisted I have become. "Why not strengthen the automail?" "I tried, but the problem is that it would be too heavy for him to use. It wouldn't be a problem if the tiny shrimp drank milk every once in a while." "Need any help?" "Well yes it would help if you tagged along there are somethings that I need to pick up in town to fix it up." "Okay."

We went into town to collect pieces for Ed's automail. "Hey Nagisa come over here." "Yeah." "Which of these is lighter?" Winry handed me to ingots made of metal. "Hmm this one." I then handed the ingot to her, and we continued. "So Nagisa where are you from?" "Uhh you wouldn't believe me." "Try me I've seen and heard crazy things." "Well I'm from a different dimension." Or anime show take your pick. "No way." What happened to seen and heard crazy? "It's true." "Okay so what do you guys have in your dimension?" "Well we have science not alchemy. I'm pretty sure you would like it." "What makes you say that?" "Well where I come from what you do is called robotic engineering we're still decades behind what you guys have, but it's going." "Can you guys resurrect the dead?" "No we can't." "Well there's one thing we have in common." More than you know except for magical powers, human sacrifices actually we have those but we call them donations to science, militaries, and better ways to kill each other.

When we returned we saw Ed and Al outside the house. "Hey Winry whose she?" "HE is here to help unlike you who always manages to destroy my automail every time I fix it up." Ed then took a closer look. Huh I'm actually taller than him, but not by much thank you animation team. "So what you doing here?" "Well I uhh..." "Ed leave him alone... Here put this on while I fix your arm and leg AGAIN." Ed put on the replacement leg and arm, and left me and Winry. "Sorry about him he's just... Well he is actually an idiot so just ignore him." "Right." "Now here come help." "Are you sure?" "Well to tell you the truth I need someone with smaller hands." There it is. "Okay."

So me and Winry began fixing Ed's automail. It was actually amazing to see how the whole concept of it came about. There were a few times when our hands touched and I could see a small tint on her cheeks even if she said it was the flame. "So Nagisa what ever happened to your friend is she coming back?" "Eventually yes... You don't think she abandoned me do you?" "What no I mean it's just that I thought she would come by now." "Yeah you are right." Who are Fuwa's friends in this dimension?

Meanwhile at Father's Lair

"Checkmate." Father flipped the table. "Every time every single damn time why why why?" "Give it to me Father?" "No." "Father..." "It's mine I earned it." He still wouldn't give it to me. "Dwarf..." "Oh fine here you go, and get out before my children come back." "Okay." I finally got it Father's book of alchemy man who thought being a wingman or winggirl could bestow upon you such gifts.

Back to Nagisa

"So Nagisa do you have a girlfriend?" "Uhh no why?" "It's just that with your looks you know you are just so pretty to be a guy." "Well I've been confused for a girl many times, and I've dressed up like a girl too." "Ha ha ha ha what?" "Yeah if you had a dress I could show you." "You would not." "Yeah I would." "Okay fine I dare you to put on one of my dresses." "What do I get if I win?" "Hmm how about a kiss?" Yes thank you alleluia alleluia whoa what is wrong with me. "Okay." Winry then pulled out a long white dress. "Here try this it 'should' fit." "We'll just see won't we." I removed my clothes, and then when I had nothing on but my boxers he walked in. God damnit I just can't get a break.

"Winry what the hell are you two doing?" Winry blushed from embarrassment. Well so much for that kiss. "Ed haven't you heard of knocking?" "Well it seems to me that the two of you are busy doing something else other than fixing up my automail." When he finished Winry threw a large wrench at him hitting his nose. Ed left us alone. "I'm so sorry about that." "Nah it's okay the last time I walked in on someone was my teacher when he was taking a bath the tub was filled with his mucus, and it made a jello like substance that took the form we tried to kill him, but he escaped through the window." Winry just burst out laughing. "Man that's crazy." "It's true he ran at mach 20 speed."

"So are you gonna try it on or what?" "We're still doing this?" "Yeah." "Okay." I put on the dress and fixed it up to look properly, and I let my hair down. When I turned I saw Winry blushing. "Wow you look so beautiful." "Told you." "Well I guess you earned it." Winry closed the gap between us and we started kissing. I could feel her holding me tighter so I deepened the kiss. Do you remember when I said I was a moron because I feel like I need to underline it and bold it because it is not stressed enough capitalize it too while you are at it. I accidentally used the kiss of death on her and knocked her out.

"Hey Nagisa I'm ba... Are you kidding me?" I just didn't have the strength left to deal with this anymore. "Hey Fuwa." "Kiss of death?" "Kiss of death." "So are you gonna you know..." "Fuwa she's unconscious." "Yeah you're right... Wanna head back?" "Yeah let's go back." Fuwa used the remote to teleport us back to The Blind King. "I don't even know where to start." "Yeah I messed up." "Not only that, but you got to live every fanboy's dream of kissing Winry Rockbell. All it took to mess it all up was another blondie from a different dimension to mess up your chances with a blondie from another dimension." Bitch sensei if you can hear my thoughts die in a fire. I turned to look at Fuwa. "So where to next?" "Hmm maybe..." "Wait before you guys go you need to watch out." "Watch out for what?" "The anime police or whatever the hell they are called I dunno I don't pay much attention." "Who are they?" "Well it is believed that they hide among background characters that you all don't really pay any mind to or at all." "Why should we?" "Well let's just say that you all's actions actually have far reaching consequences and they've started mobilizing." "WHAT!?" "Don't worry about it I'm sure it will be alright just don't step on butterflies or kill Hitler or something I dunno good luck." Then Fuwa pushed the button and we were sent out.

Winry POV

When I came to I saw that there was a note from Nagisa. I read what it said. "Dear Winry, if you are reading this then it means that I have failed to have sex with you no surprise there. If you are wondering how I knocked you out then well all it took was for me to kiss you. Don't worry I didn't do anything to your body. Although I do know that it wouldn't have worked out because you aren't into guys who are shorter than you. So farewell also I finished Ed's automail for you just need you to look it over just in case." Huh well with eyes like that and a kiss like that I could have made an exception and rocked his world. I looked over the automail. Huh the kid actually learned everything I taught him. Maybe I'll see him again someday.

AN: So it may come with a subplot besides Nagisa getting laid bet you never saw that before.


	5. Chapter 5 Sinon SAO

AN:I don't own anything.

"To think it's come to this." "Fuwa?" "Well here we go SAO part 2." "Why are you so depressed?" "Just get on with it and let's get out of here." "I mean we don't have to be here." "Well Nagisa you've really made me scrape the bottom of the barrel here we went from Fullmetal Alchemist to Sword Art Online too quickly kind of makes it look like anime is deteriorating." "Is it really that bad?" "Well just because it's a light novel doesn't make it bad I mean Konosuba was really good and that was a light novel so it's hit and miss. Mostly miss though with light novels. What sucks about this one is that it's part harem without needing it to be, but I do have this just in case." Fuwa then pulled out a sniper rifle. "So I guess my date uses a sniper rifle?" "Yep she has green hair her name is Sinon. Have fun I need a drink."

Well I kept the sniper rifle in hand and made my way to this Sinon chick. I just hope that she doesn't try to kill me. Wonder if she will be like Hayami? Nah no way I doubt it. "Hey you there where did you get that?" I turned around to see the girl. She had short green hair, and if anime rules apply here and her character design is flashy then it's probably her. "Uhh my friend gave it to me." "Really your 'friend' gave it to you?" "Yeah." Well she has a temper unlike Hayami. "Yeah why?" "It's just that that is my sniper rifle." Uhh okay gotta think fast. "Isn't it also possible that the game developers made more than one sniper rifle?" Nice thinking Nagisa now she'll never suspect a thing. "Perhaps..." Close enough. "Uhh hey my name is Nagisa Shiota." "That's a weird avatar name." "You can just call me Nagisa then." "No it's just that your avatar name look at it." I looked up to see my avatar name 'Gender' yep just like before.

Meanwhile at a Laughing Coffin hangout

"You all had one miserable job and you idiots couldn't get that right." "Sorry ma'am." I swear these people ain't worth their weight. "Uhh ma'am don't you think you've had enough?" "Shut it Michaels I'll tell you when I've had enough."

Back to Nagisa

We were running as fast as we could for as long as we could. These guys all had mini guns and were rushing us. "Nagisa quick in that cave." "Got it." We managed to hide in a small cave, however to get inside you had to crawl through. There wasn't a lot of room inside, so that meant Sinon would have to rest her body on top of mine. "Hey Nagisa are you using that sniper rifle?" "Here you go." "Thanks." Sinon tried adjusting her position on top of me. I could tell she didn't like it one bit, but she couldn't do anything about it. "Nagisa I need you to hold me close like if we were uhh doing it." "Okay." I did as she ordered. She began firing away and nailed all of them. "Nice work Sinon." I looked up at her she was blushing. "Is something wrong?" "Please tell me that is one of your knives." "It is." "You didn't check." "Is that a question that we should know the answer to?" "Fair point although could you uhh... Move it to the side it's touching and rubbing up against my..." "Say no more." I readjusted myself to make her feel more comfortable. "Thank you." "Hey don't you have a guy with a sword that you fight with?" "Yeah but I haven't seen him at all today weird supposedly he logged in, but he's in a different lobby."

Meanwhile at the Laughing Coffin private party lobby

"Who the hell are you lady?" I slapped him across the face one more time. "Where is he?" "Where's who?" He just doesn't let up does he. "Kayaba Akihiko." "He's dead lady." Wow I'am enjoying this way too much. I punched him in the face several times for raising my expectations only to completely demolish them. "And that's for not joining Klein's guild you inconsiderate prick." I then spit on his open mouth. "Where is he?" "Okay okay I'll talk." "Good." Then I continued to beat him for making me sit through that god awful arc where he and Asuna lived a married couple's life knowing that they were needed in the front lines.

Back to Nagisa

We were still in the small cave or hole with Sinon right on top of me taking pot shots at wondering gamers. "I just don't get it Sinon you saved someone's life how can you call yourself a monster." "It's complicated." "But I mean do you wish that the mother and child would have died instead of the robber." "Huh I guess you make a good point Nagisa." "Yeah and I mean if guns caused this sort of trauma on you then why are you in a game about guns if you are scared of them?" "I... Have absolutely no idea my psychiatrist said I should." "Well I mean think about it you are a hero to those two you shouldn't be moping around you should feel proud of yourself." "Huh you know Nagisa that's the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me." "Well I mean I'm sure you get that a lot." She then smiled at me.

I couldn't stop myself from blushing. "Uhh anyways shouldn't we move from here?" "Nah this is actually a good spot and the cameras can't find us here." "Oh." "Besides I think I might enjoy you holding onto me like that." "Uhh I..." Then she leaned in and kissed my cheek. "Sinon..." "Shut up." We finally kissed. She began adjusting herself to her original position. "Nagisa let's see how far we can go." "Uhh okay." Finally my journey is at an end. I began pressing her closer to me. I had to make sure that I didn't do the same mistake as before. Then my hands finally groped her ass. "Whoa..." "I'm..." "It's okay let's up the ante." The kissing started getting more passionate and we started removing several clothes. "Uhh Nagisa can you take it off I..." "Yeah sure." I began to take her belt off, and pulled down her pants and finally saw her... "In the name of the Anime Regulation Federation stop right there." SON OF A... "Nagisa quick let's go." "Fuwa?" We were teleported back.

"Okay what the hell?" "So I guess you've finally met them." "Who are those people?" "They are the Anime Regulation Federation." "So who are they?" "Well you remember how I told you about anime police being background characters?" "Yeah." "That's them." "So why are they after us?" "Well let's just say that you guys did more than just step on butterflies and kill Hitler." "Oh?" "Well for starters you impregnated a girl from another dimension, you almost killed an important character in another, not to mention that you would have been the harem series protagonist in Senran Kagura, you destroyed Winry's opinion on choosing a suitable mate, and you made Sinon get out of the Kirito's side bitch club." "Wow." "Yeah." I turned around to see Fuwa's pocket glow. "Fuwa what's that?" "Something worth more than that sniper rifle." "Is that what I think it is?" "Yeah the little glowing egg however, this one isn't like the one Kirito was given." "Oh how so?" "This one has Kayaba's code in it so it evolves over time." Fuwa then turned to me. "So Nagisa I'm sorry that I..." "Forget it it's over and done so how do we deal with these guys?" "You can't." "WHAT?" "Follow me."

He made us wear some monk like robes with hoods and made me and Fuwa carry a candle. Finally we reached and underground room that looked really old like a castle basement or something. "Okay for as long as there have been anime cliches the Federation has always existed. They have ensured that anime follows a strict protocol." "So who's in charge?" "I dunno could be anybody's guess." Of course it can. "Anyway these guys number in the trillions we're not talking about just people, but also monsters, gods, demons, you name it. They are freakishly strong, but their power levels decreases when they are afforded screen time for necessary plot points." "Okay so how strong are they?" "Hmm Gohan from DBZ times a trillion." "Really Gohan not Goku?" "Okay let's get one thing straight here if you've watched the Cell Saga you know Gohan has surpassed Goku he even says it himself. The only reason why Goku has gotten as strong as he has today is because he is more popular and the guy who made DBZ is a cash cow and possibly sellout." "Okay fair point." "Besides Gohan is more of a father figure than Goku ever was hell Piccolo raised him not Goku." "Uhh Blind King." "Oh right uhh yeah so the ARF has alwys been around to ensure that all anime follows strict rules. For example friendly relations with other anime like with One Piece and Naruto. Another example is a union strike when too many of their people were getting killed in animes such as Berserk or Attack on Titan and they only got the one season." "Uhh didn't Berserk get a..." "SHUT UP now Fuwa take him away oh and if you see a background character there's a 99% chance they are with the ARF." Then Fuwa teleported us away.

Sinon POV

I couldn't stop thinking about him no matter how hard I tried. I was hanging out with Asuna at the park. "So Shino what's the matter?" "I just can't get him out of my head." "Kirito?" "No someone else." Someone better than Kirito if what I felt wasn't a knife and it was really his... "Speaking of Kirito did you see him when you logged in?" "Uhh I saw his name, but he was in another lobby." "Oh." "Well I better go." "Right see you later."


	6. Chapter 6 Yayoi Kunizuka Psycho Pass

AN: I own nothing.

Fuwa teleported us to ending credits? "Hey Fuwa where are we?" "End credits." "Yeah but for what?" "Our anime." "Wait what?" "Yep our anime is done." "But what about the bonus chapters?" "Who knows Nagisa?" So this is like when an anime is done huh. Always thought my life would be more meaningful than this. "So are we getting a movie or an OVA something?" "I dunno probably not." "But there have been other anime that have been only half length of our show, and they get two movies." "Well what can I say Nagisa this is it end of the line." I had nothing else to say then Fuwa spoke. "Huh well we did get the two OVA's and the two live action films, but the first OVA was before the anime started not to mention it's the Kyoto incident so you know." "Well that's okay I guess not really no it's not I wanted an animated movie." "Yeah maybe, but what could it have been about... Takaoka escapes and wants to hurt you and your family that's actually pretty good."

Then The Blind King teleported to our dimension. "So I know who's in charge of the ARF." "Okay who?" "Here read this." He handed me the paper with the information.

Name: N/A

Gender: N/A

Age: N/A

Hair Color: N/A

Eye Color: N/A

Date of Birth: N/A

Blood Type: N/A

Species: N/A

Ethnicity: N/A

"Uhh Blind King this doesn't have anything useful." "When's the last time you spoke to someone who wasn't on the main cast, supporting cast, or a random person?" Fair point. "Never." "Exactly so yeah use this information wisely." "What information you didn't give us anything." "True, but it's better than nothing." "It's still nothing." "Okay but just look out for anything that blends into the background, and yeah you are right this is crap." I looked over to Fuwa. "So Fuwa what now?" "I don't really know I mean with the whole ARF thing going on can we even get you laid at this point?" "Now now children let's not get down because we can't find a good girl for Nagisa to screw." I glared at him. "Your character model doesn't support glaring idiot." Damn you. Then he started talking again. "However I do know where their leader is from." "Where?" "It's called Imokawa Mukuzo Genkanban no Maki or The Story of the Concierge Mukuzo Imokawa it was a film conceived in 1917 and it is a lost film." "Why?" "World War I and World War II so you know it was pretty chaotic." "Oh." "Yeah anyways I think I know where to send you guys next." "Really where?" "Wait here."

Then he came back with a really really old car. When he came out he had an orange vest, and looked like all retro like. "Where did you get that?" "Back to the Future cuz you needed where you are going." "And that is..." "The future my friends come on I'll drive you." "Shotgun." Fuwa rode next to him and I sat in the back. "Okay Nagisa now how do you feel about dating family members?" "Why would I do that?" "Wrong answer let's go." We were sent into the future or another anime really. "So Blind King where are we going?" "It's your great grand daughter who also happens to share the same voice actress so it's kind of like you on you, but in a different body so kind of like masturbation, but not masturbation you'll see what I mean." "Huh?" We finally arrived at what appeared to be our destination. "Okay Nagisa here is the rundown her name is Yayoi Kunizuka she is your great grand daughter. She is also a lesbian? I think maybe I dunno although she does get more ass than you so maybe ask her about that. She was dating this other chick from a rock band, and then she stopped because of anarchy and stuff so you know it didn't work out. Anyway then she started sleeping with this other chick, whose bisexual, so yeah that's going on oh also you might wanna knock up your great grand daughter." "WHAT THE HELL!?" "Well how else is your genetic bloodline going to continue now march your butt in there and screw her."

It was unbelievable I can't just have sex with my own family members let alone my descendants. "Fuwa are you serious about this?" "Nagisa where are we?" "In an anime... I get your point." Stupid anime saying it's okay to bang family members. I bet it was the light novels too, or some weird fetish the creators had. "Good now if you will excuse me I have to get several more additions to my collection." Of course she does. "Now Nagisa be sure to show her a good time." "And you?" "Me well I'm leaving good luck I don't wanna be here when the ARF gets here." I exited the car along with Fuwa and he left us. "So Nagisa here is the plan you go in there and do your thing and I'll take her gun." "Agh fine let's go." Then it dawned on me. "Wait why do you need her gun?" "Collector's item." Of course I forgot who I'am with. "Right so does it shoot magic or something? Is it infused with the souls of the dead? What is so special about it?" "Well it's called a Dominator, and basically fires only according to the person's psychological state it can shoot to kill or paralyze." "You know if only..." "Yeah it would solve THAT issue, but it has a pretty big flaw." "Oh?" "The gun may not fire at all." "How so?" "Well remember your clap stunner attack?" "Yeah." "They basically turned that into a gun here." "What who?" "Okuda, Takebayashi, and Ritsu." "Oh."

"Wait what happens to me in the future?" "Well you die obviously." No kidding gee I would have never figured that out for myself. "I know, but how do I die?" "Nagisa you cannot pay me enough to answer that question." Maybe it's for the best. "And you?" "What about me I'm gonna live forever." Right I forget I'm with someone who's been stealing artifacts that make her God so damn I bet I could have been like that too bad my character model doesn't really support otaku mode. Aww crap he's got me doing it too. "Well Nagisa here we are, and..." We heard moans really loud moans coming in from the inside. "Ooh maybe you'll get a three-way." "Maybe I might also get shot." "Just stay calm and don't panic." "Yeah because that's gonna help." "You remember the flaw I mentioned?" "That's it?" "Yep." Well I'll be damned. "Okay so you go in and do whatever it is you do and I'll get her gun." "You're not gonna help me?" "Nagisa I'd love to, but someone has to make sure the ARF isn't on our tail." "Right." "Besides you'll be fine just you know don't screw it up this time."

I knocked on the door and waited for someone to come and open it. Then a tall blonde woman opened it up she was naked under her robe. "Yes how can I help you?" Alright here goes. "Is my great grand daughter inside? Her name is Yayoi Kunizuka." The blonde woman was in disbelief. "Uhh okay listen kid are you..." I just walked in past the woman and saw her. "Who are you?" "I'm your great grand father." "Really?" "Yeah." The woman retained a calm expression in her face. "Hey Kunizuka who's the kid do you know him?" "No I don't." "Well I'm from the past." Or a different anime take your pick. "Let's say I believe you why are you here?" Crap how do you tell your great grand daughter that her long dead relative is here to sleep with her think Nagisa think. That's it it's perfect and it's the truth. "I'm here to sleep with you to continue my genetic bloodline." Well hopefully she won't shoot me. "Wait here while I get my gun." Crap crap crap crap wait Fuwa she probably got her gun. Then she came back...with...her...gun. Agh son of a bitch.

She aimed it at me. Okay gotta stay calm this isn't the first time someone's threatened your life. "Hm." She looked at her gun again. "Something the matter Yayoi?" "It seems it won't fire so I guess he could be right." Phew it does pay to be the main character in an anime. Unless of course you are in those kinds of anime where the main character dies, but still I mean this isn't one of those is it? "Well can we keep him I mean what's the harm in having one more join the party?" Wait what she can't be serious can she?

Meanwhile with Fuwa

"Where did she run off too?" "I dunno let's look over there." Crap they found us gotta go warn Nagisa. I pulled out the remote to check the battery level. Seems like it's got a few more jumps in it good that will have to do. I made my way back to where we were dropped off to go find him. I made my way up to the apartment and picked the lock. I could definitely hear the moans and grunting coming in from the room. Well at least he's getting lucky. Then I heard a voice. "Wow you know for a small child you sure do..." I covered my ears. Yep definitely don't need to know about that specific aspect of his life. Then it dawned on me. Is he actually screwing his own great grand daughter? Well I can understand his concern for his genetic bloodline, but still what the hell. Wait we're in an anime so what the hell right. I finally found the gun it was on the table. I grabbed it and checked to see if it was loaded. Good a full magazine now if they come by I'll just shoot them. "Aww God that was amazing..." And of course I had to forget to cover my ears to hear the great finale at least it wasn't his voice. Then he finally stepped out. "How do you feel?" "Like I need a shower or a really really long one that never ends." "So no?" "No." "Well don't worry I got a gun and I figure we'll just go somewhere else so c'mon." Then I teleported us to the next dimension.


	7. Chapter 7 Sailor Moon Sailor Venus

AN: I own nothing.

We teleported to a different dimension. "Fuwa where are we?" "Sailor Moon." "So... Sailor Moon?" "Sailor Venus actually and as long as you are there..." "What object is it this time?" "Rainbow Crystal." "Okay." "Oh and Nagisa people here are taller for some reason so just a heads up." Not like I haven't already met women that are taller than me. I looked around to see if I would find said woman when I got a call from him. "Hey Nagisa it's me The Blind King." "Ugh what is it?" "So I got good news, bad news, and terrible news. Which do you wanna hear first?" "Terrible news." "Okay so you guys are still being chased by the ARF." "Okay." "Bad news is your character model doesn't support sex without pregnancy." "What do you mean sex without pregnancy?" "So remember how you had sex with Kayano when your anime ended and you got her pregnant?" "Yes." "Well as it turns out..." "NO!" "Yep you my friend have super sperm. You will keep impregnating women condom or no condom." "Why?" "Dude blame the fact that when your character only had sex it was to get a girl pregnant rather than enjoyment." "Son of a... And the good news?" "Well there is several Broken Black Blade just got her weapon and turned five, you impregnated both your great grand daughter and her lover, and super sperm won't get in the way of us getting you LAID LAID know what I mean?"

I ended the call with him. As I kept walking I noticed that the middle schoolers here were significantly taller what the hell animation team. Alright all I gotta do is find her and get...her...pregnant...even...though...I...have...no GODDAMN POWER OVER IT AGH. Then I saw the girl that Fuwa was referring to. Well she kind of reminds me of Nakamura only taller, and prettier, with really nice legs, and ah crap what is happening to me I'm becoming Okajima. I saw her talking to another blonde girl. Well here goes nothing.

Meanwhile at the ARF headquarters

"Have we found them yet?" "Negative we are still looking." "Damn it those three have broken most of the regulations in anime already why can't we get them?" "Well they're the main characters, and you know the rules when it comes to main characters." "Yeah I remember when we signed the treaty to only kill main characters if it was necessary for the plot, even then to only catch them when necessary to advance the plot and have a face to face moment with the villain." I waited a moment. "What charges have we filed against them?" "Well besides the acquisition of several artifacts we have, attempted murder, 3 accounts of impregnation, a girl who left a harem protagonist's spurned woman's club, sex with an afore mentioned lesbian, sex with a bisexual, sex with a character who had no concept of it, changing a girl's taste in men, changing the sexual orientation of aforementioned lesbian and bisexual, and now whatever they are up to in this universe." "Very well then send in any available units I want to know what these three are really up to." "Yes." Those three are breaking so many rules that have made what anime is today. If we allowed them to continue any longer they might break the fabric of anime as a whole. We can't allow that.

Meanwhile with Nagisa

"You know for a guy you are really cute." "Oh umm thank you uhh you too." She smiled at me. Okay so I grab the crystal and get out now where in her body is it. "Hey Nagisa is something the matter?" "Huh... Oh no it's just that I was thinking about something else is all." "Oh what?" About whether or not I'll get you pregnant seriously though what a huge design flaw. Seriously he's got me doing it too. It's all a pain in the ass. "It's just that I'm visiting with a friend and she's not around we got kind of separated." "Oh is she..." "No she is not my girlfriend." "Oh umm I'm..." "No it's okay." There was a pause before I started speaking again. "So uhh anyway I wanted to..." "In the name of the ARF..." Thank you I didn't want to impregnate her. "Nagisa stand back I got this." Phew good thing she has magical powers. Then I saw Fuwa come in behind me. "Any luck?" "Nope not like it matters look she is getting rid of them." I pointed over to where Venus was handing the ARF their butts.

"Umm Nagisa you know they aren't supposed to kill her right only us?" I completely forgot about that. "So did you get her crystal?" "I did not." "Don't worry I have a plan." "Does it involve that gun you stole?" "Yes it does don't worry though it will work." What the hell could Fuwa be thinking? Venus walked over to us. "It wasn't much, but I took care of them." She looked at Fuwa. "So are you Nagisa's friend?" "Yeah." She is also the sole vexation upon my existence right about now. "Any way mind joining us for a second." "Sure why... Where are we?" Fuwa teleported us to Fullmetal Alchemist. "So Fuwa who are these two?" "He is Nagisa the one I told you about her on the other hand..." Fuwa shot Venus dead and stole her crystal. "FUWA WHAT THE HELL !?" "Relax she comes back to life in the anime, but right now..." She pulled out a red stone and used it on Venus. "I what the... What happened?" "Relax don't worry about it dearie." Fuwa then sent her back to her dimension. "So Nagisa let's get back out there." Fuwa teleported us to the next dimension.

AN: So classes start back on Tuesday for me so slow updates. Anyway the fic only stays alive if you request for it all the chapters have been requests minus the first one. Even thought the rest were not requested through the reviews they were requested through PM's from Autistic Grizzly. So yeah you guys choose where the story goes I don't. It's more fun for me this way. Hell I didn't even watch D. Gray Man and still wrote it because I researched for it just like this one, Sinon, Asuka, and Psycho Pass. Anyways now all that I ask for is Name of Character and Anime gonna bump this up to an M rating so I could use foul language and more dirty jokes. No lemons unless I change my mind.


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